Soul Searching/End Game
SS Chapter 6 - New Allies
By Chem Prof
Chapter 6, New Allies
“Mr. Potter, would you say that you had unusual friends?”
Harry was surprised at this question. Other than the fact that they were wizards, he didn’t think that his friends were unusual. After exchanging a nervous glance with Hermione he answered, “I don’t think so, no.”
“When you first came here six years ago, you were accompanied by a half-giant. Would you consider him a friend?”
“Hagrid? Sure.” Harry responded without a thought. “He’s a great friend.”
“I see. You attended the meeting today with the werewolf, Remus Lupin.”
“Oh, right. Yeah he’s a friend, too. Actually, he was one of my dad’s best friends. He’s sort of watching out for me now, and he’s actually more of a mentor. When I first met him he was my professor, but he wants me to think of him like a friend now.”
“Of course. And when we were scheduling today’s meeting, messages were carried for you by an unusual house elf, who also responded to your summons just now. He was wearing clothing and did not seem to be bound to you, yet he did your bidding. How is that?”
“Dobby? No, he’s not bound to me, he’s just a friend who likes to help me.” Harry replied, still wondering where this line of questioning was going.
“Indeed. And have you made the acquaintance of a centaur named Firenze?”
“Yes, I know Firenze. He teaches at Hogwarts now, but I met him my first year there. He really helped my out of a jam in the Forbidden Forest. He gave me a ride away from a dangerous situation.”
“A centaur willingly permitted you to ride on his back?” Only years of self control kept Ragnok from showing his shock at this revelation.
“Yes, he did. Some of the other centaurs were rather upset with him, though.”
Ragnok stared at Harry thoughtfully. Finally he stated, “In the lobby of your Ministry of Magic there is a farcical set of statues called ‘The Fountain of Magical Brethren’ which implies that the magical creatures represented are all brothers. You have had dealings with at least one member of each race represented there. Do you regard them as equal beings?”
Harry frowned as he considered the message behind this question. “Well, they’re all different and have different abilities, so they’re not exactly equal in that sense, but I don’t think that any one of the races is necessarily better than any other.” He thought about his answer for a moment and added, “I’ve met a few centaurs that wouldn’t agree with that, though.”
Ragnok nearly laughed. As it was, a snort escaped before he could control himself. The condescension of the centaurs toward other beings, all of which they considered to be their inferiors, was well known. He again regarded Harry thoughtfully for a long while.
“Mr. Potter, I don’t believe you fully realize it, but you are very different from most wizards in your attitudes toward other magical beings. As such, it is in our best interest to see that you are successful in your current struggle with the Dark Lord.”
Harry exchanged startled looks with Hermione. He started to respond but Ragnok held up a hand and he calmed down. Ragnok continued, “I apologize for my presumption. It has been clear to us that Lord Voldemort considers you his primary enemy and we are aware that you have fought and stopped him more than merely the one time for which you are renowned. While Gringotts has excellent sources of information, I am sure that you have things which must remain secret. This was obvious to us given how difficult it was to reach you. I assure you that we will respect your privacy. We only ask that you consider us allies in this struggle.”
He stood and Harry and Hermione did likewise. “For more than 500 years, Gringotts has stayed neutral in wizarding wars. We see this, however, as nothing less than a chance to completely change the nature of wizard-goblin relations. We know the stakes. Voldemort has made no secret of the contempt with which he holds any beings other than pure-blood wizards. You appear to be precisely the opposite. Both of you, as a matter of fact,” he nodded at Hermione as he said this. “For us this is a question of survival. You must be victorious. We want to assist you in any way possible.”
Harry thought he understood the stress on the word ‘any’ but he turned to Hermione for confirmation. She understood his unspoken question and nodded to him. He thought quickly how to best frame his question. “Sir, please don’t be offended by this question. Just tell me if is out of line and I’ll never mention it again.” He paused. Ragnok, whose head had jerked back involuntarily with the word ‘Sir’ nodded for him to continue. “If we could positively identify certain of your depositors as Death Eaters, what might you be able to do with that information?”
Ragnok’s smile was much more evil than the ones Harry had seen earlier. “Those depositors might find that they have difficulty accessing their vaults.”
Harry thought carefully. “Would you agree with me that any Death Eaters we fought last year at the Ministry would be considered confirmed?”
“I would indeed.”
“Another individual that I would consider to be positively identified as a Death Eater would be Peter Pettigrew.”
It was unheard of to see a goblin look startled. The expression on Ragnok’s face was probably as close to startled as any wizard had ever witnessed. After a careful pause, he spoke evenly. “From the way you phrased that statement, Mr. Potter, am I to assume that you believe that Mr. Pettigrew is still alive?”
“I know he is still alive. I have had two very unpleasant encounters with him in recent years.” He paused and considered his next words. He decided he needed to show he trusted this goblin in response to his extraordinary offer. “Peter Pettigrew was instrumental in the resurrection of Lord Voldemort. I was there when it happened.” Hermione gripped his arm as he said these words. He looked at her and she nodded her support.
Ragnok studied the two without expression as he processed this information. He began making connections with the information his goblin intelligence network had provided him on the exploits of Harry Potter.
“From your relationship with Mr. Black, we had already come to the conclusion that you did not believe him to be responsible for your parents’ deaths. Hermione clutched his arm more tightly as she sensed Harry tense up at these words. “It is also obvious that you believe that he was falsely imprisoned. Would it be accurate to say that you might have been involved in his escape from Hogwarts?”
Hermione could feel that Harry was struggling to keep his composure as he relived these memories, so she stepped in for him. “We both were. We rescued him from the tower where he was being held. Please forgive us for not going into the details.”
Ragnok turned to Hermione with increased respect in his eyes. “You have accompanied Mr. Potter on many of his exploits, have you not?”
“Many, but not all. I was present at his first encounter with Peter Pettigrew, but not the second.”
“Very well. I will have our records changed to indicate that Mr. Pettigrew is alive and is a Death Eater.” Ragnok said in a businesslike fashion. “From the Ministry encounter we have identified Mr. Avery, Mr. Crabbe, Mr. Dolohov, Mr. Jugson, Mr. Rabastan Lestrange, Mr. Rodolphus Lestrange, Mrs. Bellatrix Lestrange, Mr. MacNair, Mr. Malfoy, Mr. Mulciber, Mr. Nott, and Mr. Rookwood.” He looked up. “Are there any other names we should know about?”
“Goyle, and Barty Crouch, Jr. He’s dead, but I don’t know anything about his estate.”
“Indeed. He had previously been convicted and sentenced to Azkaban and was presumed to have died there. However our information is that he was later found alive at Hogwarts. I assume you know more about this case also?”
Hermione reached over and put an arm around Harry. She knew this story, and it wasn’t going to be easy for Harry to relive. Her action was not lost on Ragnok. Harry began, “He escaped from Azkaban polyjuiced to appear as his mother. His father, Barty Sr., kept him locked up at home but he eventually escaped. He impersonated Alastor Moody at Hogwarts for a year. Near the end of the year, he killed his father, and he was responsible for tricking me into grabbing the portkey that took me to Voldemort, for the encounter I described earlier.”
“I escaped from Voldemort after he was restored to his body, and made it back to Hogwarts. I was there while Professor Dumbledore interrogated Crouch under Veritaserum. During this interrogation he admitted killing his father. Then Fudge let a dementor kiss him.”
Again, Ragnok was unable to hide his interest. He was more certain than ever that he had made the correct decision regarding Harry. “Mr. Potter, was there any significant event in the wizarding world during the last four years that you were not involved in?”
Harry and Hermione both laughed, breaking the tension that had been building up in Harry while he recounted these painful memories. Harry responded, “Believe me, sir, it’s certainly not by choice. Trouble just seems to find me.”
Ragnok smiled again and returned to business. “Are there any other names we should be aware of?”
Harry thought again. “Snape.” He spat the name out venomously and Hermione shuddered.
“Of course. We are aware of the unfortunate circumstances of the Headmaster’s death.” Hermione again moved closer to Harry and put her hand on his. “Is that all?”
“Does the name Tom Riddle mean anything to you?”
Yes, we are familiar with that name. We were not aware that many wizards possessed this knowledge. But of course Albus Dumbledore would have known. Evidently he shared this information with you?”
“No, actually Tom told me himself.” The look on Ragnok’s face was plain to interpret. Why would he tell you of all people information that he clearly would want kept secret? Harry chose to alleviate his unexpressed curiosity. “He was about to kill me at the time. It didn’t work out the way he intended. I killed him instead. That would be the second time I killed him. Unfortunately, he just won’t stay dead.”
“Mr. Potter, may I tell you that you are possibly the most interesting wizard I have ever met?” Ragnok said, shaking his head. “Please, is there anything else we can do for you?”
Harry was getting more comfortable with this goblin, and was really starting to like him. With another glance at Hermione, and seeing her unspoken approval in her eyes, he pressed on. “I have been learning as much as I can about Tom Riddle this year. We are searching for items which may have belonged to him. Are you aware of any of his possessions which may be stored here at Gringotts?”
“I am not, but I will have our staff check on this, and will alert them to be on the lookout for any such items. Can you give me an idea of the nature of the items you seek?”
“They would possibly be historical artifacts which may have once belonged to one of the Hogwarts founders.”
“Very well. Is that all?”
Harry wasn’t sure if he should keep pushing his luck, but one more thing was on his mind. “I don’t want to insult Gringotts, but shortly after the first time I ever came here, I read that there had been an attempted break in.”
Ragnok looked annoyed now. “I recall that incident very well. How does it concern you?”
Harry was immediately uncomfortable and wished he had kept his mouth shut, but Hermione suddenly said, “Ohhh,” as she realized what he was talking about. Ragnok turned his attention to her.
“Apparently it does concern our discussion, if Ms.Granger has made the connection. Please continue.”
“We later found out that the one who broke in was Professor Quirrell, who had Voldemort attached to the back of his head at the time.” He suddenly realized how ridiculous that sounded. “I mean, Voldemort was possessing him. I was just concerned that if Voldemort discovered how to break in here once he might try to do it again.”
“Mr. Potter, I believe that is the most bizarre statement that I have heard in all my years at Gringotts. If it was made by anyone other than you I would throw him out of this bank. I have come to understand, however, that in matters regarding you the bizarre is actually rather common. So I will merely assure you that steps have been taken to prevent a recurrence. If Voldemort or anyone he is currently possessing attempts to break in to Gringotts again, he will be in for a very uncomfortable surprise.”
“Thank you Ragnok,” Harry said with relief. “That was my only reason for bringing it up. I appreciate your reassurances.” He and Hermione stood, as did Ragnok.
“I believe that concludes our business. May I assume that you and your mate would like to visit your vault now?” Ragnok had noted all of the nonverbal communication that had gone on between the two of them during the discussion, and had made the obvious conclusion.
Harry turned bright red and tried to stammer out a reply. Hermione, more than a little pink herself, managed to answer first. “Oh, we’re not together like that. We’re just very good friends. But yes, we would like to see the vault.”
“My apologies for the misunderstanding. The two of you are obviously very close.” That was something they all could agree with.
As they went out the door, Ragnok was shaking hands with Harry and Hermione and saying, “It was a pleasure, Mr. Potter. If there is ever anything I can do for you please do not hesitate to ask.”
Harry and Hermione looked up to find Remus, Tonks, and Bill staring at them wide-mouthed. Bill started trying to speak. “He … you … he said … you didn’t …”
Remus was the first one to achieve coherence. “Harry, you just met privately for an hour with the head goblin of Gringotts. That’s unheard of. And that offer he just made you. We couldn’t possibly have heard that right.”
“Guys, I’m tired. Let’s go visit the vault and go home. I’ll tell you about it later. On second thought, Remus and Tonks, can you go see Fred and George and pick up anything they have for us? Bill, let’s go to see the Black vault.”
Noticing that Bill was still a little shell shocked, Harry winked at Hermione and said, “You know, Bill, your boss is a pretty nice guy.” Bill clutched at one of the marble columns they were passing to keep himself from falling over. He just stared at them as Harry took Hermione’s hand and casually strolled up to Griphook and followed him over to the carts that led to the vaults. “You coming?” he called over his shoulder to Bill.
-ooOoo-
They didn’t spend too much time in the Black family vault. It was enormous, and filled with magical objects of every kind. There were also mountains of gold galleons and cabinets full of documents. Harry remarked to Bill that it looked like a lifetime job, but he just grinned and shook his head and said that he would have all the help he asked for, since Harry seemed to be a personal friend of the head goblin.
“We’ll have all this checked out and documented in no time. Maybe not before the wedding, but certainly by the end of July. By the way, you two are coming, right? Ginny told me to tell you … well, you probably don’t want to hear her exact words, but if you don’t want bats flying out of your nose you should probably come.” Harry and Hermione assured him that they would be there and they left to take the portkey back home.
-ooOoo-
“I’m exhausted.” Harry said as they rejoined Remus and Tonks back at the Grangers. “I just want to sit out by the swimming pool for an hour, then it’s my day to cook. Why don’t you join us for supper? Hermione, do you think that would be OK with your parents?”
“As long as you’re cooking, I don’t think they would mind. I’ll call them and check to make sure. Then I’ll meet you out at the pool.”
Harry put on the same swim trunks he had been wearing. He decided that tomorrow he would start swimming laps for exercise and would try out one of his other suits. For today, he was just relaxing, paddling slowly around the pool. When Hermione came out to join him he noted that she had worn yet another bikini. He had noticed that she had worn a different bikini every time they went to the pool, and that they seemed to be getting smaller. This one was a blue and green geometric print and had little strings that tied at her hips and held up a small triangle of fabric that covered her in front. As with her other suits, the triangle top barely covered her breasts.
Now that he and Hermione had clarified their relationship Harry was more comfortable with her swimwear. When they were at the pool the day after their long discussion she had mentioned that she didn’t mind that he seemed to appreciate how she looked in a swimsuit, and that she took it as a compliment. He didn’t think he ought to appreciate it too much, though and he had a hard time not noticing how little of her was covered.
He climbed out of the pool and sat down next to Hermione in one of the lounge chairs. He noticed the relaxed, satisfied expression on her face as she laid back on the lounge, soaking up the sun.
“You enjoy just laying in the sun like that, don’t you?”
She sat up a little to turn to answer him. “Yes, my mum and I both do. I guess I get it from her.”
“I guess that’s why you always looked so tan when you came back to school in the fall.” Harry hesitated, obviously struggling with what he wanted to ask next. Hermione recognized this and made no response, patiently waiting for his question.
“Hermione, can I ask you a question?”
“Of course, Harry, why would you think you couldn’t?”
“Well, I don’t know if it’s too personal, and I don’t want you to get mad at me.”
Hermione sat up and swung her legs around facing him, then leaned forward to grab his hands in hers. As she did so, he received an unexpected view down her top, and blushed as he tried to keep his eyes focused on her face.
Hermione fought to keep a smile off her face. She knew that Harry was just being a typical teenage boy, but it was still funny. She might be able to have some fun with him about this. She returned her thoughts to his question and said seriously, “Harry, let’s have an understanding. As best friends, we won’t be afraid to ask each other anything. If I think it’s too personal or don’t want to answer, I’ll let you know politely. In the same way, if you don’t want to answer you’ll tell me without getting angry or sulking. We’ll both trust each other not to keep things to ourselves unnecessarily.”
At Harry’s frown she hastily continued, “I’m going to have to work to keep from nagging you to tell me things you don’t want to and you’re going to have to work to be more open with me.”
Harry finally relaxed and nodded. “That’s definitely something I have to work on. Thanks for being understanding about it.”
“Now, what did you want to ask?”
“Well, I don’t know much about girls’ swimsuits, seeing as how you’re the only girl I’ve ever seen in one, but there just doesn’t seem to be much to yours. I was wondering if the suits you wear are normal for muggle girls, or are they smaller than average?”
Hermione smiled in relief. She hadn’t been sure what question would have him so upset, but it made perfect sense now. “Well, this suit is on the small side, but it’s still within the normal range for muggle teens. At the beaches we go to in France, the suits are mostly like this or even smaller. I have a much smaller one than this but I haven’t worn it yet this summer.”
Harry’s mind boggled. How could a swimsuit get much smaller than that one?
‘In fact,” Hermione continued after a silent debate with herself, “normally my mum and I don’t wear the tops with our swimsuits here around the pool.” She saw the expected shock on his face and laughed as she continued. “It’s a habit we picked up years ago. Don’t worry, this pool is private enough that no one can see us. We haven’t been doing it this summer because we didn’t want to embarrass you.”
Harry finally found his voice and tried to think of something to say that he hoped wouldn’t sound silly. “Uh, why?” was all he could come up with.
“Well, it just feels good. It especially feels nice swimming without a top, and there’s also a feeling of freedom just lying there exposed to the sun and the breeze. You like to feel the sun and the breeze on your bare chest, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I guess I do. I never thought about it before.”
At this point Tonks and Remus joined them. Tonks had borrowed one of Hermione’s swimsuits but Remus had stayed dressed. Harry noted immediately that he had been right about Tonks having a navel piercing and raised an eyebrow toward Hermione who smiled back at him in agreement.
They talked for a while about what had happened at Gringotts. Tonks reminded Harry to read the letter that Sirius had left him which would explain what he had been thinking. She assured him that as far as she was concerned the guardianship was in name only, it was obvious to her that he could take care of himself, and so she wouldn’t interfere with what they were planning. Harry now realized why she had been so concerned on the train and earlier in the week when they had been discussing their plans. Eventually Harry looked at his watch and announced that it was time for him to start dinner.
Tonight he had selected chicken in easy sauce, which didn’t require a lot of attention to make. He merely had to put six chicken breasts in a pan and cover them with a sauce made from cream of mushroom soup and cheese and bake them for an hour. While they were baking, he had plenty of time to make some rice and green beans, and get changed, and still be able to continue talking with the others. Hermione and Tonks offered to help and, not sure of their cooking skills, he allowed Tonks to make the beans and Hermione to set the table. He would have Dan select the wine later.
While they were in the kitchen, Tonks explained the training program she had in mind. “First, you need to get into better shape. You too, Hermione. You’ll have to improve your endurance and your strength. I know you’ve played a lot of quidditch, but that doesn’t exercise all of your muscles. You should do both running and swimming regularly. That will get you into condition. You can see how far you can go before you get tired and use that as a measure of your endurance.”
Hermione interjected, “We just picked up some exercise clothing Sunday; we could go out running every morning.”
Tonks nodded. “It would also be good if you could do some weight training. Do you have access to any weights?”
Harry shook his head, but replied, “Dudley has some but I don’t know if he would let us use them. I’ve seen him work out so I have an idea of what to do. We could buy some but I don’t know where we could put them.”
“We have an area in the basement we might be able to use,” Hermione put in. “I’ll check with my dad. He’s the only one who uses it.”
“For your spell training, I’ve reserved an unused Auror training ground out in the country. I didn’t think your parents would be too happy to have you practicing blasting hexes around the house. It will also get around the restriction on underage magic for Harry.”
Harry recalled his discussion with Hermione about the detection of underage magic. They wouldn’t catch him in any case here at the Grangers because Hermione was of age, yet Tonks either didn’t know or was maintaining the sham. He had a nagging feeling that there was something important that he was overlooking about this discovery and decided to bring it up again with Hermione when he had a chance.
Meanwhile, Tonks was continuing. “I have a portkey that you can use to get there tomorrow; after that you can apparate there.” She looked at Harry. “I assume you can apparate even though you don’t have a license yet?” Harry smiled over at Hermione who merely looked down and shook her head, but not before Harry caught the smile on her face. Tonks noticed this interchange and commented in a prim voice, “Condoning rule breaking, now, are we Ms. Granger?” They all got a laugh out of that. Tonks finished up as the Grangers arrived home. “Either Remus or I will be over to get you tomorrow at 10:00. Wear comfortable clothing that you can fall down in. Figure on being there all afternoon.”
Dan and Emma were impressed with Harry’s efforts for dinner. Harry made a comment that at least something good had come out of his time at the Dursleys, which made Hermione wince, but it went unnoticed by her parents. Dan picked out a wine Harry had never heard of, but that went particularly well with the dish he had prepared.
They had a long supper as Tonks entertained them with her metamorph abilities, Remus explained what was and wasn’t true about werewolves, and Harry and Hermione took turns telling them about the trip to Gringotts. They mentioned that Harry was now very wealthy without giving out any exact numbers, and left out the private meeting with Ragnok. Hermione’s eyes sparkled as she described her bequest from Sirius, the entire library at Grimmauld Place.
After supper Emma took them all into the family room and pulled out a bag. “I bought something that I think will be useful for you today.” She pulled out six cellular phones. “We wanted to be able to keep in touch with Hermione while we were gone, and then I also thought that this might be a good way for you to communicate amongst yourselves. It certainly would be faster than your owls!”
Harry and Hermione agreed that it was a great idea, while Tonks and Remus weren’t sure. The Grangers kept one, Harry and Hermione decided to keep one each for themselves, and they gave one to Tonks and one to Remus. They decided it wouldn’t be worth it to give one to Ron, since he wouldn’t be comfortable using a ‘fellytone’ and once they had the mirrors he wouldn’t need it.
They showed Remus and Tonks how to use the phones, and put each other’s numbers on speed dial. The adults finally came around after they all went into separate rooms and practiced calling each other, and they realized how useful this muggle invention could be.
Before Remus and Tonks left, they gave Harry and Hermione the things they had picked up from the twins. In addition to the two mirrors, they had dragonhide boots and vests, concealment cloaks that would help them stay inconspicuous when they visited Diagon Alley, and some explosive devices that Ron had decided could be used in a diversionary manner during a battle. They also had wand holders, for both the wrist and the leg. Tonks told them that she frequently used the leg holder strapped to her thigh, but some Aurors preferred to attach them to their calves.
There were also two boxes of small, egg shaped objects. Tonks explained that one type contained the darkness powder that Malfoy had used so effectively during the attack on Hogwarts. She silenced Harry’s angry retort when she showed him the other type. It would instantly dispel the darkness created by the original. These were brand new and not for sale to the public. They immediately grasped the combat implications. An enemy could have his concealing darkness instantly ripped away and be exposed for an attack. The two types of eggs were different colors and also different textures so they could be easily distinguished from each other.
The most unusual items were small disks that the twins called cloaking charms. They could be attached to an item and the effect would be as though it had a permanent disillusionment charm on it. This charm had the advantage of not requiring any attention from the spell caster to maintain, and wouldn’t dissipate even if the owner was rendered unconscious, the way a normal disillusionment charm would. The twins sent their apologies that the cloaking charms only worked on small items, not something as large as a person. They would be perfect for concealing something like a spare wand, though. Ron had wanted them to buy two more invisibility cloaks, but those were really rare and they hadn’t been able to find any for sale.
When the couple left, Harry and Hermione decided to try out the mirrors. Harry went into his room and Hermione into hers and they first called each other. Just as Sirius had explained the year before, you had to say the other person’s name into the mirror, and the other person had to respond with your name before the two mirrors would start to work. Then Harry decided to call Ron. They quickly discovered that they didn’t have 3-way capability, only one of them could talk to Ron at a time. Hermione joined him in his room as he was talking to Ron so she could hear what Ron had to say.
“… and I thought we should all get some top of the line brooms, what do you think?” Ron was saying eagerly. Harry looked over at Hermione and her first reaction was to roll her eyes. Boys and their toys! But she did realize that they should have as many different transportation options as they could get, and nodded her approval.
“OK, good idea,” Harry responded to the mirror after getting the go-ahead. “But Hermione doesn’t need a Firebolt. Get her a high quality touring broom. It should be capable of going fast, but doesn’t need the maneuverability of the Firebolt and could use more stability. She’s not going to do a Wronsky feint on the thing after all.” Harry also confirmed that Ron would be able to join them for training with Tonks the next morning.
“Harry, do you want to talk to Ginny?” Ron asked as they finished the conversation.
“Uh, no, not right now,” Harry said uncomfortably. He wasn’t quite sure what kind of relationship he had now with Ginny after breaking up with her, and didn’t really want to explain to her what they were up to. “Maybe some other time.”
“OK, mate, whatever you say.” Ron was clearly disappointed. He had wanted Harry and Ginny to get together for a long time, and was hoping the breakup was only temporary. “You know she’d love to hear from you.” Harry acknowledged this and closed the connection. He didn’t notice the sad expression on Hermione’s face.
Harry turned to Hermione with a thoughtful look on his face. After a moment it changed to one of resignation. He sighed, and finally spoke up. “I know it’s getting late, but I want to read the letter from Sirius.” He hesitated before going on. “Would you stay here and read it with me?”
“Of course, Harry, but let’s take it downstairs to the family room. Mum and Dad will leave us alone if we ask, and it will be more comfortable there.” She smiled to herself as she left unspoken the other reason for her suggestion. While this most likely had never crossed Harry’s mind, it probably wasn’t a good idea for her to stay this long in Harry’s bedroom. She had a feeling her parents, particularly her mum, weren’t convinced that she and Harry were ‘just friends’ and would wonder if something were going on that they should be concerned about.
“We really ought to get some butterbeers here,” said Hermione as she retrieved two cokes from the fridge. They settled down on the couch and Harry pulled out the letter. She scooted over next to him so she could read over his shoulder.
Dear Harry,
I need to apologize to you for so many things. I apologize for telling you this in a letter instead of to your face. I apologize for getting myself killed (I must have if you’re reading this) instead of being here for you. Mostly, though, I apologize for not being there for you for the twelve years we spent in prison. My stupid temper made me go after Peter instead of taking care of you like James and Lily wanted and the result was that we both went to prison, me to Azkaban and you to the Dursleys. Harry, you have to believe me that if I’d had any idea what it was like for you there I would have broken out somehow and come to rescue you.
Unfortunately, my time in prison didn’t end when I escaped Azkaban. Even though you saved my life in the tower, I failed you again when I let Peter escape, and now I’m locked up here in the first place I ever escaped from, my family home. James rescued me the first time, you rescued me the second time, but now I have to try to rescue myself. I’m going insane here not being able to do anything. Patience has never been one of my strong points, and what little I had is now gone. I’m leaving here and going after Peter. Only by finding him and turning him in will I ever be free. I don’t know if you can understand this but I hope you do.
By now you know about the arrangements I’ve made. Tonks has agreed to be your official guardian as a favor to her favorite cousin, and Remus is willing to help her any way he can. Don’t let them know I’m telling you this, but there’s definitely something between the two of them. If you can figure out a way to help it along, do it. Unfortunately Remus is as stubborn as me (and you now that I think about it) and will probably need a push. They both deserve the happiness.
It’s June as I write this. I’m only waiting for your term to end so I can see you one last time before I go. I’m sure you know that if you were ever in trouble I’d come for you in an instant, just like I know you’d do for me. In fact, it is my deepest hope that when you read this it’s because I died saving you. If I did then I will in some way have fulfilled my promise to your parents.
My last piece of advice is to never forget who your friends are. I had James and Remus, you have Ron and Hermione. You know you can trust them. Be sure you don’t push them away. They’ll always be there for you; you just need to let them. There are other people in your life who care about you too, and will also help you with whatever you need. That includes most of the Weasleys (you know the exception), especially the younger ones.
Goodbye Harry. I know this money can’t even begin to make up for what we had and should have had together, but I hope you will make good use of it. Spend whatever it takes to make you and those around you as safe as possible. I know it’s not necessary to tell you to help those who need it, because that’s the way you are by nature. Remember, James and Lily and I will always be watching over you.
Sirius
Tears were flowing down Hermione’s face as she finished the letter, and she saw that Harry was struggling to hold back his emotions. Grabbing him in a fierce hug, she said, “Just let it out Harry. It’s OK.” She felt hot tears fall against her neck and soak into her shirt as he finally broke down and grieved for his losses, not just Sirius but also his parents and Dumbledore.
Eventually, his emotions spent, he pulled back and looked at her with gratitude in his eyes. “Thanks, Hermione,” he said simply. “Thanks for being here with me. Thanks for being you.”
He turned and stared off at nothing in particular as he recalled something Dumbledore had told him years ago. “The Professor said once that those we love never truly leave us. I think I understand better now what he was talking about.”
With that Hermione took his hand and led him out to the other room where they said goodnight to Dan and Emma and headed off to bed.
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